Friday, August 8, 2008

Last Day of Work

I should probably say last day of work - in the office. Husband doesn't actually believe I won't be going in again but I'm not going to. The bid I worked on in July is closing in September so I may do some closing logistical help for my team from home - they are nervous about my leaving since they know how hard it is to reach the partner on "mundane" closing questions.

I've been wondering whether expectant parenthood has chanced my outlook on work. One one hand there can be no disagreement that I haven't been working very hard since I signed up my last bid in early July but I'm not sure how much relates to being sick of working and just plain being exhausted by pregnancy (especially since we haven't had a vacation since Christmas - no, Disney does not count). I've stopped obsessing over my blackberry on nights and weekends but I do answer emergency questions when I see them.

On the other hand I've given quite a bit of thought as to how I want to "come back" (still a work in progress) and I still very much care about my clients and projects - so my passion for deal work hasn't faded. I actually met yesterday with my department head and the partner who assigns work in our department. I outlined the "deal on/off" structure I've discussed on this blog. The department head was very enthusiastic and told me that he really wants us to "make it work" for me - even if that means we need to re-evaluate after a few months. The assigning partner seemed not very enthusiastic but he was on by telephone and isn't nearly as expressive as the department head. One thing I'm still mulling over is whether I should be "full time". I have no doubt that I can make our 1900 billable minimum with the "deal on/off" structure but after 4 years of billing 2400 I think I won't be "exceeding expectations" as I have been by just meeting the minimum. Since I have to write up the proposal and run it through some channels before I return in March I'll keep thinking on it.

It's been almost 5 years in this office figuring out what it means to be a "Big Firm Lawyer" and while I know I'll enjoy (and struggle with) raising our kids for the next 6 months I will miss my colleagues and the intellectual challenge of the job. But not enough to cut my leave short!

3 comments:

Helen said...

"I should probably say last day of work - in the office. Husband doesn't actually believe I won't be going in again but I'm not going to. The bid I worked on in July is closing in September so I may do some closing logistical help for my team from home - they are nervous about my leaving since they know how hard it is to reach the partner on "mundane" closing questions. "

Oh look- already not saying "No"- great, sure, work from home in September- let them bleed you dry!

a crapshack in nova said...

Be open to the fact that your perspective on work may change greatly over the course of the next 6 months-- In either direction. I know both moms who planned to go back full time and grew to love staying home so much that they quit. And I also know moms who wanted to stay home and couldn't stand it, and jumped back into work full time. Hopefully you will find your "happy medium."

Husband, if she starts trying to "help" with work once the twinkies arrive, I give you permission to flush the crackberry down the toilet. :-)

brittae@yahoo.com said...

Are you getting/taking 6 months of leave!? Wow!