Friday, October 15, 2010

Security Blankets Are For The Weak

Penny's potty training experiment for one weekend failed and now neither kid is showing much interest in doing their business in anywhere but their diaper and that is fine - we'll revisit early Spring. But in the meantime I can't not traumatize them at 2.2 so we took away their pacifiers.

My reasoning is that when they turn 3 they will be potty trained (hopefully), starting pre-school, probably moving to "big kid" beds. That's a lot. So Why would I also want to argue with them about pacifiers? Their memories and demands are just going to get bigger/louder as they get older. Pacifiers are a bit of a secret shame of mine - they only have them in their cribs so you wouldn't know my kids were pacifier kids. Also, I am very happy that they don't suck their fingers since I did growing up and it is way harder to break.

Feeling good about being proactive and in control of a toddler's destiny (ha, ha), next step was to decide HOW to do it. I reached out to the local MOT club for advice and even got some good advice as to why we shouldn't get rid of them. Good reasons but not enough to overcome the "I don't want to deal with this when they are 3/4" feeling. I immediately dismissed the "binky fairy" because (1) fairies are kind of creepy and (2) I didn't want the kids to freak out in the morning when they were gone and (3) I'd have to get a present ahead of time. My nanny was hugely in favor of tying them to a balloon and releasing them but I was against that for litterbug reasons. Someone suggested "mailing" the pacis to babies and another suggested build-a-bear as a reward. Initially I was going to put the final pacifier in the build-a-bear and then I could remind the kids that the pacifier was close to them. Then I thought - "holy crap, what if they go all crazy at night and try to rip into the bear"? I should also point out that I think build-a-bear is a ridiculous racket and I hate, hate the place but I really couldn't come up with something better and the kids are fascinated by the store when they play at the indoor playspace on rainy days.

I bought a special Mikey Mouse envelope at the post office and for a few days leading up to the event I told Ned and Penny how they were big kids and that it was time to give their pacifiers to babies and that they would get a big boy/girl bear to sleep with instead. Ned seemed okay and didn't really engage me on it. Penny would get all panicky and ask for a "nap" so she could go check on her paci. She was going to be toughest I knew. After all, we let her have her pacifier more during the year of constant doctors visits and hospital stays. Plus she sometimes puts Josephine's pacifier in her mouth (a different type so they can easily distinguish).

Wednesday rolled around and I talked it up, took them for flu shots, ignored their runny noses and decided to plunge ahead, all mother-of-the-year style. When they got up from their naps I brought in the envelop where I had put all the miscellaneous ones and asked them to put their pacis in which they did and then we were off to build-a-bear! Ned could have cared less about building a bear because there were COMPUTER SCREENS AND KEYBOARDS (if I had known that I might have come up with another plan). Penny did okay until it was time to stuff the bear but she quickly recovered and picked out a "doctor bear" outfit. Ned cared so little that I got him a fireman one without much consultation. $64 and 20 mins later we left with these stupid bear houses that we had to manage with 2 toddlers and one infant. I stupidly forgot the camera and to look for coupons online.

Penny cried for 2 hours that night. Ned could have cared less. Husband made a rookie mistake of taking her out of her crib which just prolonged the agony. Eventually I shut off the monitor and they slept until 7 am. Nap on Thursday required about 20 mins to cry and she woke up early but that was because her ear hurt - turns out she has an ear infection (I mentioned mother-of-the year, right?). Twenty mins of crying last night and I'm hopeful that nap/bedtime will be easier today. When I checked on her last night she was hugging a different bear and sound asleep.

Mommy: 1 ; Pacifiers: 0.


Liz Jimenez said...

I'm with you on the "I'd rather not deal with this at 3/4" issue. As much as the few days might suck, I think better to do it earlier.

Hope everyone is feeling better!

Marcia (123 blog) said...

K, you are a stronger woman than I am. I love love love my sleep too much and I'm getting soft in my old age (!) - I'm sure they won't be going to school with them, right? LOL

Unknown said...

Congratulations! I'm quite jealous as I will very definitely be dealing with this at 3 or 4 (gasp!). Lord only knows what I will be paying at Build a Bear when that day rolls around :-)

T. said...

Remind me to re-visit this post in about 2 years, because I already have a pacifier baby.

Donna said...

I guess I am a bad mom - I didn't do anything but just took it away from DS1. One day I just said, no more pacifer and that was it. He cried for about 2-3 naps and bedtime but that was it and it was over with. Luckily, DS2 always hated pacifers - never took one ever. So, at least I don't have to deal with that - now security blankies that is a different story - with both of them!

Bekki said...

Maybe this might help someone in the future, but my friend cut a little hole in the end of the sucker part, and her daughter gave it up on her own. I have one finger sucker, so I'm not sure what I'm going to do about him.

AiringMyLaundry said...

My kids never liked pacifiers. But they are thumb suckers and the dentist says that my daughter needs to quit that. My son did but my daughter keeps sucking away.

Amelia said...

Laugh out loud funny, thanks for sharing.